Laid Bare

Fourteen years ago, as a young widow and mother of four, I watched as men avoided me like the plague, dodging, and running for their lives! Understandably an environment with such intense emotion, and oodles of children would send many men hiking.

However, there were a few brave soldiers that could stand the heat; amazingly Mark, the man who became my husband; a bold pastor friend; and one man whose impact on my life went unnoticed until I moved out of town and said my goodbyes.

This man was my doctor for fourteen years, during the season when male presence was definitively lacking in my life. Every year during my annual exam my doc attentively sat on his examining stool sincerely inquiring about the ins and outs of my life. As crazy as it sounds this phenomenon actually caused me to look forward to my annuals, not so I could place my feet in the cold metal stirrups while baring my body, but because his kindness made space for the baring of my soul.

When I told the doc my family and I would be moving across country, we both smiled and acknowledged the loss we would feel, like a teacher missing a student who graduates to the next grade. As with every teacher who finds one or two special students, bonding occurs when we witness life morphing before our eyes.

During my first office visit the conversation with the doc was about my single life, my deliberate choices, and my non-existent dating life! Over time the conversation shifted as I remarried and built a new life, while the doc worked on blending his children and girl friend’s children together.

It’s a beautiful thing to hold a space that allows a person to morph through their life. It’s worth the temporary humiliation of vulnerably laying oneself out in the open to receive the benefit of watchful care and under-girding. When we allow space for one another we too become caring physicians. Thanks doctor Solomon for your care and friendship over the years. You rock!